10 on Tuesday

1. I am beat.

2.  Derek is 3 and still isn’t talking much. Following the advice of Derek’s peditrician, we had him evaluated.  It’s been a very long process.  Although it was painless, it’s been exhausting.  Today we had our IEP meeting with the school district.  Long story short, Derek will be going to school ( therapy) 5, yes FIVE, days a week starting this fall.  It will  be for 3 hours a day.

3. I know it’s best for him, I am just not ready for it.  I can’t even think about it without crying.

4. I feel bad for being so upset. It’s nothing serious.  I have nothing to be upset about, it could be a whole lot worse.

5.  I was hold back tears during the entire meeting today.  It’s hard to listen to 6 complete strangers analyze his very move.

6. To make matters worse, as soon as we sat down, one of the women that did the screening gave me a picture of Derek that had been taken during one of the first meetings.  So, I had that sweet little face staring up at me the entire time.  Dan later said he almost turned it over cause he knew that it was making things harder for me.

7. The school he will be going to is only about 4 blocks from our house.  But, he does have the option of riding the bus.  Don’t even get me started on that though!

8. He has been so clingy lately.  Hopefully that changes in the next 3 months.

9. I know that this is going to help him tremendously.  I have to just keep telling myself that.

10. I am going to try and move on now.